30 Life Lessons I’ve Learned Along the Way
A friend of mine sent me this article about 5 years ago, and ever since then, I knew I wanted to write something similar once I turned 30 someday.
Well, time is a strange thing, and that someday is today.
I’m officially 30.
If you read this recent post, then you may know that I haven’t felt good about it, and rather have been dreading it. Almost as if life ends at 30. Not sure why as women we’re made to believe our prime time is our 20s, and everything ends for us after that. I’ve found that this is certainly not the case, and am very excited for the journey ahead.
Looking ahead.
I am looking forward to looking back when I’m 35 or 40, and realizing that what I am about to write is or could be completely different than how I view the world now.
I think that’s what’s beautiful about life, is that everything in nature, including us, is forever changing.
I wrote something similar when I turned 25 here. This might officially become my thing.
So, without further ado, here are the 30 lessons I’ve learned in 30 years:
1.Make peace with your past. Constantly work on healing. Everyone, good or bad, has a past, and know that your story is beautiful. Healing your past will allow you to live more in the present, and it’s something your future self will thank you for. Always remind yourself that each day there’s always a new story to tell. Strive to make sure it’s a good one and one that aligns with what you really want out of this life.
2. Don’t overthink about what could’ve, should’ve or would’ve happened. Things are just as they should be, and you always have the option to pivot at any point in your life.
3. Don’t chase happiness. Chase freedom instead. Freedom from the desire to have, be, or to be doing something other than what you are currently doing in that present moment. Chase freedom to get out of things that don’t align with you. Chase freedom from people pleasing, and rather work on being authentically yourself. I’ve found this is where inner peace, authentic living, and in return, happiness lies.
4. A long walk with your favorite song is always a good idea.
5. Nothing is permanent. Not your emotions, people, moments, negative thoughts or hardships. Good news is you don’t have to go through it forever. Bad news is nothing you love is forever. Learn to be present and honor both moments.
6. See more sunsets – they’re truly magical. Making an effort to see the sunset at the beach has made my life exponentially better. Taking a moment to yourself, outside of social media is important. Just sit there and be in the moment and realize how beautiful life can really be.
7. Money isn’t going to make your life better. Stop chasing money and following a career path that is safe and secure. You need to find work that feels right in your heart and one that you have a passion for.
8. Time is your most valuable asset and commodity. You will never get your precious time back. The saying “spend your time wisely” is overused, and yet, we forget how much truth that phrase has.
9. Don’t compare where you are in life with others. Your journey is your own, and the only person you can be in a competition with is the person you were yesterday. That might sound cheesy, but it’s 100% true. It’s how I’ve lived my life, and it has served me well so far. Don’t forget to be kind to yourself in this process, though.
10. There is never a “right time” for anything. Start now. When starting anything, always aim to have a growth mindset. Embrace being bad at things at first. Things don’t happen over time, and depending on natural talent is not something that’s measurable nor always achievable. If you find you quit right when you start to feel failure, question that feeling and learn to move past it. You learn so much from failure and it always moves you forward to what is truly meant for you!
11. Live where your heart is happy. It’s important to live where you feel the most alive and at a place that allows you to see the world in a different light. This will also help you get out of the mundane. So, get out of your comfort zone and leave your home state. It’ll probably make you a better person and give you a whole new perspective on life. Might give you a lot of joy as well.
12. Love yourself and your human journey. Over said, but not over done. If you think about it, seriously think about it, the longest relationship you will ever have is the one with yourself. Make sure to always nurture that relationship. Me, myself and I mentality is important.
13. You are the one you’ve been waiting for. When you finally realize you are the one responsible for your actions, thoughts, your life and happiness; things shift. No one else will save you, heal you, or be there for you as much as you can be for yourself.
14. Being kind is always a good idea.
15. Your thoughts create your reality. Focus on having thoughts that enrich your life versus one’s that belittle you.
16. Don’t fight with reality. Everything in nature is as it should be. Whenever we fight with what is, we experience suffering. Remember, pain needs to be recognized, but suffering is optional.
17. Your parents won’t be around forever, give them a hug more often. Sadly a true fact, and each moment you have with them is limited. Cherish the moments you have with them. Put down your phone and be fully present. Call them more often. If there is some healing to do, forgive them. Neither you or your parents will be here forever. I’ve found it’s best to have love in your heart and to forgive people. And reminder, as Steve Jobs said: “Death is the single best invention of life”.
18. Stay mindful and present of each moment. Once a moment passes, you’ll never have it back. Stay present and cherish each moment you have living in this expansive world. Live in the present moment. I’ve found the mundane things are actually things we look back, and cherish – like the memory of being with my grandfather and holding his hand. I’ll always miss that.
19. Don’t focus on things you can’t control. Rather focus on things that you can change and have control over.
Things you can control:
- How you treat your body
- Your efforts
- How nice you treat yourself
- How much work you put into being the best version of yourself
- Your outlook on life
- Your thoughts
20. If you want to change any part of your life: stop talking about it and start taking action through your habits. Change is done through habits. It’s a simple fact that I find we sometimes overlook. Habits are not as complicated as you might think. Two things to help you with habits: 1. Read Atomic Habits by James Clear and 2. Don’t listen to people that say give yourself a certain amount of time, rather give yourself all the time you need to build a new habit. Persistence always pays off.
21. Life was never meant to be easy. As Matthew McConaughey says, “Life is not easy. It is not. Don’t try to make it that way. Life’s not fair, it never was, it isn’t now, and it won’t ever be.” I found that instead of wishing it were easier; rather work on being better, growing your mindset and becoming tougher than life. It somehow does get easier this way.
22. Motivation is actually a skill you can learn. Mind-blowing, I know.
23. Your body is your home – take care of it. Just like how you clean your house, you need to make sure to keep your body clean with exercise and nutritious food.
24. Stand up straight when you walk into a room. And don’t ever doubt if you are good enough or question if others are better than you. Half the time, most of the people are also faking it, and most likely thinking about themselves.
25. Always, always tell people how you feel. Tell them you love them – you’ll never regret that, I promise.
26. Wake up early and go see the sunrise. Don’t over-romanticize sleep, rather over-romanticize the time you have left to be able to experience the little moments in this life. Little moments like seeing the sunrise or sunsets make life exponentially more beautiful.
27. Nobody cares or is over-analyzing the situation in your head as you are. Stop caring about what people think of you. It’s wasted energy. Learn to refocus your energy on things that will help you become a better version of yourself instead. Life’s too short to fret over the things that are so miniscule in the large scheme of things.
28. Be at peace with not having all your questions answered. I do wonder quite often if we’ll ever have all the answers to the questions we’re seeking in this lifetime. I have a feeling that we won’t, and I think that’s okay.
29. Know what you want. Write down your goals each week, month, year, decade. You are allowed to reinvent yourself as many times as you want or need to.
30. How you do anything is how you do everything. Don’t underestimate the value of hard work. Nowadays, with people going viral on the internet, or people posting about such a small fraction of their life, we may be influenced to think things should come easy. NO. Things will never be handed to you and if they are, it probably won’t mean much. Whether at your 9-5, or other areas of your life, make sure you are always giving your 100%. This will reflect in other areas of your life, and hey, you’ll probably get a promotion too.
Those are the 30 life lessons I’ve learned in 30 years.
I know I have a lot more to learn in my journey ahead. I look forward to learning more about the growth mindset and becoming a better version of myself each day.
Steve Jobs:
So far, Steve Jobs’ quotes have gotten me through most of my late 20’s. His influence and words live inside my head (rent free, as they would say) as I feel that he left an important imprint on our life with his work and his words.
So, with that, here’s a quote that I have a feeling will be the theme of most of my 30s:
“When you grow up you tend to get told that the world is the way it is and your life is just to live your life inside the world. Try not to bash into the walls too much. Try to have a nice family life, have fun, save a little money. That’s a very limited life. Life can be much broader once you discover one simple fact: Everything around you that you call life was made up by people that were no smarter than you. And you can change it, you can influence it… Once you learn that, you’ll never be the same again.”
― Steve Jobs
Until next time,
Ozzy
